by Shelley Hitz
Because of where we are in life right now, taking a step of faith in ministry and following Jesus where He leads us, this song and the lyrics really impact me!
"Follow You" by Leeland and Brandon Heath
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
The Catch
by CJ Hitz
Recently (August 21-28) I had the opportunity to accompany my friend David on a Canoeing/Camping/Fishing trip in the Boundary Waters Wilderness area of northern Minnesota. We had an incredible time taking in the solitude and beauty of this serene part of the country without the distractions of TV, Internet or cell phone coverage that are so part of the standard American diet.
On our third day, David caught a decent sized Walleye that we ate for dinner that evening. If you've ever eaten fish on the same day it's caught, you'll agree you can't beat the taste as a result of that freshness. Same with chicken, vegetables, fruit...everything really (except wine). Anyway, the next day as I was writing in my journal, I found myself writing this request to the Lord...
"Lord, we're going fishing again later this afternoon and I'd really like to catch this evening's dinner. I know David is the better fisherman, but I'd like to be The Man for tonight's grub..."
Just a simple, yet direct request. Within our first fifteen minutes on the water, David reels in this beautiful Northern Pike that he proceeds to immediately throw back into Lake La Croix. Later, he would kick himself for doing this. For the next hour, we proceed to make cast after cast without hardly a nibble. As the sun is continuing to set, David proceeds to pull his line out of the water and begins slowly paddling our canoe back toward Tiger Bay - location of our campsite for the week. I wasn't quite ready to hang it up for the evening so I told David I would continue casting a few more minutes which he more than welcomed. My frustration was continuing to increase with each fish-less cast and I began reminding the Lord of my journal entry request. "Lord, I know you're able to provide a fish...if you want to." Nothing. "We're running out of time here Lord." Nothing. "Yes, we still have peanut butter & jelly sandwiches and beef jerky but..." Nothing. "Lord?"
And then at the peak of my frustration...BANG! FISH ON!!
David nearly fell over with excitement as I reeled in a beauty of a fish. But not just a fish, another Walleye which we both prefer to eat and is much easier to fillet. But not just any Walleye, one that was bigger than the night before and perfect for the two of us hungry men. And it came just in time.
When I later told David what I had written in my journal earlier that day, he realized why he must have thrown that Northern Pike back. Normally, he would have kept that fish until we caught something better. This is why he briefly beat himself up, wondering why he would do such a thing. God was teaching us a lesson in provision on this day.
As I was apologizing to the Lord for the impatient, souring attitude I had pre-catch, I felt Him gently say to me...
"CJ, this is just a fish (which I own by the way). I'm your Provider. I'm your Source. I'll take care of you and Shelley. I'll come through, trust Me. Lean on Me as you take this next step in the journey."
Yes this was just a fish. But this fish was used to teach me a HUGE lesson and encourage me in my faith and trust in the God of this universe. The God who enjoys giving His children good gifts that cause them to practically fall out of their canoe due to excitement! Reminds me of this little nugget...
“You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him." - Matthew 7:9-11
Did I mention how tasty that fish was?
CJ
Recently (August 21-28) I had the opportunity to accompany my friend David on a Canoeing/Camping/Fishing trip in the Boundary Waters Wilderness area of northern Minnesota. We had an incredible time taking in the solitude and beauty of this serene part of the country without the distractions of TV, Internet or cell phone coverage that are so part of the standard American diet.
On our third day, David caught a decent sized Walleye that we ate for dinner that evening. If you've ever eaten fish on the same day it's caught, you'll agree you can't beat the taste as a result of that freshness. Same with chicken, vegetables, fruit...everything really (except wine). Anyway, the next day as I was writing in my journal, I found myself writing this request to the Lord...
"Lord, we're going fishing again later this afternoon and I'd really like to catch this evening's dinner. I know David is the better fisherman, but I'd like to be The Man for tonight's grub..."
Just a simple, yet direct request. Within our first fifteen minutes on the water, David reels in this beautiful Northern Pike that he proceeds to immediately throw back into Lake La Croix. Later, he would kick himself for doing this. For the next hour, we proceed to make cast after cast without hardly a nibble. As the sun is continuing to set, David proceeds to pull his line out of the water and begins slowly paddling our canoe back toward Tiger Bay - location of our campsite for the week. I wasn't quite ready to hang it up for the evening so I told David I would continue casting a few more minutes which he more than welcomed. My frustration was continuing to increase with each fish-less cast and I began reminding the Lord of my journal entry request. "Lord, I know you're able to provide a fish...if you want to." Nothing. "We're running out of time here Lord." Nothing. "Yes, we still have peanut butter & jelly sandwiches and beef jerky but..." Nothing. "Lord?"
And then at the peak of my frustration...BANG! FISH ON!!
David nearly fell over with excitement as I reeled in a beauty of a fish. But not just a fish, another Walleye which we both prefer to eat and is much easier to fillet. But not just any Walleye, one that was bigger than the night before and perfect for the two of us hungry men. And it came just in time.
When I later told David what I had written in my journal earlier that day, he realized why he must have thrown that Northern Pike back. Normally, he would have kept that fish until we caught something better. This is why he briefly beat himself up, wondering why he would do such a thing. God was teaching us a lesson in provision on this day.
As I was apologizing to the Lord for the impatient, souring attitude I had pre-catch, I felt Him gently say to me...
"CJ, this is just a fish (which I own by the way). I'm your Provider. I'm your Source. I'll take care of you and Shelley. I'll come through, trust Me. Lean on Me as you take this next step in the journey."
Yes this was just a fish. But this fish was used to teach me a HUGE lesson and encourage me in my faith and trust in the God of this universe. The God who enjoys giving His children good gifts that cause them to practically fall out of their canoe due to excitement! Reminds me of this little nugget...
“You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him." - Matthew 7:9-11
Did I mention how tasty that fish was?
CJ
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Stepping off the High Dive
by Shelley Hitz
This month we are taking a big step of faith. I have officially resigned my position as a Physical Therapist as of September 22nd in order to have more flexibility to travel and speak with CJ. After September 22nd, I will continue to work for the hospital with prn status, which is similar to a substitute. I will work weekends and fill-in for therapists that are sick or on vacation.
The way I describe it to people is like this: I am standing on the edge of a high dive getting ready to jump off. I know it will be exciting, but I'm still scared to jump off. 1, 2, 3...ready or now, here we go!!!
And yet God is teaching me so much through this time. He is teaching me to relinquish the control of my life and trust Him to lead us and provide for us. He is teaching me that security in life does not come from a paycheck every two weeks but from Him. He is teaching me to care more about what He thinks about me than what other people think. He is teaching me faith.
And He is showing me that I don't need to give in to fear, doubt and unbelief. That what we are doing right now is making ourselves available to Him. Then, He can lead and direct us from here. We are opening our lives and our schedules to be available for whatever He leads us to do.
For example, as doors open for us to speak, we will be on the road traveling as "Tramps for the Lord." However, when we are home, CJ can accept jobs to substitute teach and I can work prn at the hospital.
However, if at some point God leads me to take another physical therapy job, I can do that. Or if He leads me to take a 3-month travel therapy job, I can do that. And if He opens up doors for us to travel and speak full time, great! If not, we are confident that He will lead us in the next steps and provide for us every step of the way.
Very. Exciting. Times.
I don't think we'll ever look back on our lives and regret making this decision. However, I think if we don't take this step, we could someday look back and ask ourselves, "What if..." "What if we had taken that step of faith...what could have been? What did God want to accomplish through our lives?" We don't want to live with any regrets. Therefore, we are ready to take this step of faith and allow God to lead us.
How about you? What is God asking you to do? It may be something small. It may be something big. Whatever it is, we encourage you to listen for His still, small voice...and then obey.
"Then Jesus said to them all: 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."' Luke 9:23
This month we are taking a big step of faith. I have officially resigned my position as a Physical Therapist as of September 22nd in order to have more flexibility to travel and speak with CJ. After September 22nd, I will continue to work for the hospital with prn status, which is similar to a substitute. I will work weekends and fill-in for therapists that are sick or on vacation.
The way I describe it to people is like this: I am standing on the edge of a high dive getting ready to jump off. I know it will be exciting, but I'm still scared to jump off. 1, 2, 3...ready or now, here we go!!!
And yet God is teaching me so much through this time. He is teaching me to relinquish the control of my life and trust Him to lead us and provide for us. He is teaching me that security in life does not come from a paycheck every two weeks but from Him. He is teaching me to care more about what He thinks about me than what other people think. He is teaching me faith.
And He is showing me that I don't need to give in to fear, doubt and unbelief. That what we are doing right now is making ourselves available to Him. Then, He can lead and direct us from here. We are opening our lives and our schedules to be available for whatever He leads us to do.
For example, as doors open for us to speak, we will be on the road traveling as "Tramps for the Lord." However, when we are home, CJ can accept jobs to substitute teach and I can work prn at the hospital.
However, if at some point God leads me to take another physical therapy job, I can do that. Or if He leads me to take a 3-month travel therapy job, I can do that. And if He opens up doors for us to travel and speak full time, great! If not, we are confident that He will lead us in the next steps and provide for us every step of the way.
Very. Exciting. Times.
I don't think we'll ever look back on our lives and regret making this decision. However, I think if we don't take this step, we could someday look back and ask ourselves, "What if..." "What if we had taken that step of faith...what could have been? What did God want to accomplish through our lives?" We don't want to live with any regrets. Therefore, we are ready to take this step of faith and allow God to lead us.
How about you? What is God asking you to do? It may be something small. It may be something big. Whatever it is, we encourage you to listen for His still, small voice...and then obey.
"Then Jesus said to them all: 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."' Luke 9:23
My retreat focused on solitude in MN and how God broke my heart...
by Shelley Hitz
It’s hard to fully put in words what God did in my heart this past week. It happened in nature and solitude. A retreat in a lake cabin in Minnesota where some friends we met on one of our speaking engagements, the Wetterstroms, invited me to stay…what a blessing to have this time to unplug from the world in order to plug into Jesus.
Because I am an extrovert and get energy from being around people, spending time by myself in solitude is often difficult. It takes some time for the waters of my soul to settle in order to hear from God. And this time was no different. It was awkward at first and I found myself missing CJ. I had dropped him and his friend David Todd off at the Boundary Waters for a canoeing/wilderness trip on Sunday morning and then drove to the Wetterstrom’s lake cabin by myself. I had no way to even call CJ and talk because he didn’t get cell phone reception where he was canoeing and camping. Nevertheless, this time of solitude ended up being very fruitful in my heart.
Have you ever thought about taking a retreat by yourself to practice solitude? If not, I’d encourage you to try it! Even if only for a few hours in a local park or a few days in a retreat center, it can be a powerful time of spiritual growth in your life. I know every time I have taken time for solitude, it has been impactful. My first retreat was less than two full days and I think that was all the time by myself I could handle. But, some very significant healing happened on that trip from some hurts of the past.
So, what a blessing it was to have this time of solitude with God in nature once again. My favorite time of the day was waking up to watch the beautiful sunrises over the lake and listening to the loons. So. Very. Peaceful.
I recently was inspired to re-read the book about Keith Green’s life called, “No Compromise.” He was a popular and controversial Christian musician in the late 70’s that tragically died at the age of 28 in a plane accident along with two of his young children. His story is a powerful story of his spiritual journey that led him to Christ and the ministry God gave him through his music and preaching. Very inspirational.
There is a section of his book where he talks about a breakthrough that happened in his life. He was reading a chapter in a book by Charles Finney called, “Breaking Up the Fallow Ground” based on Hosea 10:12, “break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until he comes.” He describes fallow or unplowed ground as “ground that has been tilled but has gotten hard and now lies waste. It needs broken up and made soft again before it is ready to receive seed.” The Holy Spirit used this teaching to convict Keith’s heart and bring about personal repentance in his life as well as in his ministry. I’d encourage you to read the full story here
Inspired by Charles Finney, Keith and Melody Green edited and paraphrased what they learned on repentance for others. You can read the article here.
As I read this information, the Holy Spirit also began to convict my heart…on many levels. I wrote in my journal, “I realize I have some hard ground in my heart that needs your touch Lord. I feel so complacent and dead inside right now. There are sparks of your Spirit but I’m not on fire right now.” I then went on to write out a list of my sins…wow! Here are just a few…
* Complacency/numbness towards the poor, unsaved
* Laziness/wasting time on things that don’t really matter or won’t last like my phone, Facebook, internet
* Lack of prayer
* Lack of time in God’s Word
* Pride, ego, self centeredness – esp. in regards to ministry
* Wanting the approval of others – how I look, how I present myself
* Greed/materialism – wanting to spend money on myself, love for gadgets/things
* Jealousy/envy of other people – their abilities, their relationships, their ministries
* Complaining/grumbling spirit – complaining anytime I have a little ache or pain, am inconvenienced, etc.
* Being critical and judgmental of other Christians and/or of family for their choices
* Control – taking control of my life instead of living surrendered to God
* And the list went on and on.
Wow. I had no clue there was so much hard ground in my heart that needed broken up. I felt led to write an e-mail to some family members asking for their forgiveness as well as a few other people. Tears were shed as I felt like I was being broken. And yet God began to bring breakthough in my heart as well as breakthrough in some of my relationships.
I wrote in my journal what I sensed God saying to me after I asked forgiveness and repented of my many, many sins, “I am not here to condemn you. I forgive you. Now, go and sin no more. Repent and leave your old self behind. Allow me to fill all the empty spots where your old self used to be. Allow me to fill you with humility, surrender, faith, hard work as directed by me, putting others above yourself, lover of Me and of people, filled with my Holy Spirit, always connected with me and attached to the vine – allow me to abide and live in you.”
There was something that lifted and a breakthrough that began to occur. A fresh start. A new day. New beginnings and grace. “Therefore is anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17. Forgiveness, grace and mercy. Oh how I need God’s grace so desperately and am so thankful for it!
The morning I went to pick up CJ and David at the Boundary Waters, I hiked into the first portage to meet them. I arrived early and so I went exploring and hiking. It ended up being such a rich time with the Lord. I sensed that I needed to return to my first love. That I’ve been so self-centered, self-focused and self-consumed that I’ve put MYSELF ahead of God. Ouch. That’s pride. I had forsaken my first love. Revelations 2:4-5 says, “Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.”
As I hiked along a stream, I ended up in this area where the water was a still pool. It was so still that I could see an almost perfect reflection of the trees in the background in the water. It was so beautiful. And I sensed God reminding me that I am a reflection of Him to others. As He continues to purify my heart, thoughts and motives through true and deep repentance, I become more of a reflection of Him.
And so the journey has just begun. I am so imperfect and yet God’s power is able to empower me to change. By staying focused on Him and connected to His Spirit. By listening to Him and allowing the Holy Spirit to guide me instead of trying to control my own life. By trusting Him instead of worrying.
We are getting ready soon to take a big step of faith in our ministry and in our lives. I know that God brought me to this lake cabin to prepare me for what is ahead. I encourage each of you to also consider a time of solitude, reflection and repentance. Because God wants to bring breakthrough for each of His children.
“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord” Acts 3:19
It’s hard to fully put in words what God did in my heart this past week. It happened in nature and solitude. A retreat in a lake cabin in Minnesota where some friends we met on one of our speaking engagements, the Wetterstroms, invited me to stay…what a blessing to have this time to unplug from the world in order to plug into Jesus.
Because I am an extrovert and get energy from being around people, spending time by myself in solitude is often difficult. It takes some time for the waters of my soul to settle in order to hear from God. And this time was no different. It was awkward at first and I found myself missing CJ. I had dropped him and his friend David Todd off at the Boundary Waters for a canoeing/wilderness trip on Sunday morning and then drove to the Wetterstrom’s lake cabin by myself. I had no way to even call CJ and talk because he didn’t get cell phone reception where he was canoeing and camping. Nevertheless, this time of solitude ended up being very fruitful in my heart.
Have you ever thought about taking a retreat by yourself to practice solitude? If not, I’d encourage you to try it! Even if only for a few hours in a local park or a few days in a retreat center, it can be a powerful time of spiritual growth in your life. I know every time I have taken time for solitude, it has been impactful. My first retreat was less than two full days and I think that was all the time by myself I could handle. But, some very significant healing happened on that trip from some hurts of the past.
So, what a blessing it was to have this time of solitude with God in nature once again. My favorite time of the day was waking up to watch the beautiful sunrises over the lake and listening to the loons. So. Very. Peaceful.
I recently was inspired to re-read the book about Keith Green’s life called, “No Compromise.” He was a popular and controversial Christian musician in the late 70’s that tragically died at the age of 28 in a plane accident along with two of his young children. His story is a powerful story of his spiritual journey that led him to Christ and the ministry God gave him through his music and preaching. Very inspirational.
There is a section of his book where he talks about a breakthrough that happened in his life. He was reading a chapter in a book by Charles Finney called, “Breaking Up the Fallow Ground” based on Hosea 10:12, “break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until he comes.” He describes fallow or unplowed ground as “ground that has been tilled but has gotten hard and now lies waste. It needs broken up and made soft again before it is ready to receive seed.” The Holy Spirit used this teaching to convict Keith’s heart and bring about personal repentance in his life as well as in his ministry. I’d encourage you to read the full story here
Inspired by Charles Finney, Keith and Melody Green edited and paraphrased what they learned on repentance for others. You can read the article here.
As I read this information, the Holy Spirit also began to convict my heart…on many levels. I wrote in my journal, “I realize I have some hard ground in my heart that needs your touch Lord. I feel so complacent and dead inside right now. There are sparks of your Spirit but I’m not on fire right now.” I then went on to write out a list of my sins…wow! Here are just a few…
* Complacency/numbness towards the poor, unsaved
* Laziness/wasting time on things that don’t really matter or won’t last like my phone, Facebook, internet
* Lack of prayer
* Lack of time in God’s Word
* Pride, ego, self centeredness – esp. in regards to ministry
* Wanting the approval of others – how I look, how I present myself
* Greed/materialism – wanting to spend money on myself, love for gadgets/things
* Jealousy/envy of other people – their abilities, their relationships, their ministries
* Complaining/grumbling spirit – complaining anytime I have a little ache or pain, am inconvenienced, etc.
* Being critical and judgmental of other Christians and/or of family for their choices
* Control – taking control of my life instead of living surrendered to God
* And the list went on and on.
Wow. I had no clue there was so much hard ground in my heart that needed broken up. I felt led to write an e-mail to some family members asking for their forgiveness as well as a few other people. Tears were shed as I felt like I was being broken. And yet God began to bring breakthough in my heart as well as breakthrough in some of my relationships.
I wrote in my journal what I sensed God saying to me after I asked forgiveness and repented of my many, many sins, “I am not here to condemn you. I forgive you. Now, go and sin no more. Repent and leave your old self behind. Allow me to fill all the empty spots where your old self used to be. Allow me to fill you with humility, surrender, faith, hard work as directed by me, putting others above yourself, lover of Me and of people, filled with my Holy Spirit, always connected with me and attached to the vine – allow me to abide and live in you.”
There was something that lifted and a breakthrough that began to occur. A fresh start. A new day. New beginnings and grace. “Therefore is anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17. Forgiveness, grace and mercy. Oh how I need God’s grace so desperately and am so thankful for it!
The morning I went to pick up CJ and David at the Boundary Waters, I hiked into the first portage to meet them. I arrived early and so I went exploring and hiking. It ended up being such a rich time with the Lord. I sensed that I needed to return to my first love. That I’ve been so self-centered, self-focused and self-consumed that I’ve put MYSELF ahead of God. Ouch. That’s pride. I had forsaken my first love. Revelations 2:4-5 says, “Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.”
As I hiked along a stream, I ended up in this area where the water was a still pool. It was so still that I could see an almost perfect reflection of the trees in the background in the water. It was so beautiful. And I sensed God reminding me that I am a reflection of Him to others. As He continues to purify my heart, thoughts and motives through true and deep repentance, I become more of a reflection of Him.
And so the journey has just begun. I am so imperfect and yet God’s power is able to empower me to change. By staying focused on Him and connected to His Spirit. By listening to Him and allowing the Holy Spirit to guide me instead of trying to control my own life. By trusting Him instead of worrying.
We are getting ready soon to take a big step of faith in our ministry and in our lives. I know that God brought me to this lake cabin to prepare me for what is ahead. I encourage each of you to also consider a time of solitude, reflection and repentance. Because God wants to bring breakthrough for each of His children.
“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord” Acts 3:19
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)